please share this new Ruby Wax promo for Media Parents with as many employers as you can!
www.mediaparents.co.uk is a new jobs and social networking website for people who want to work flexibly in media. If you would like to share your experience on our blog please email admin@mediaparents.co.uk or contact us through the Media Parents site
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4CskzWXBI0
Media Parents members generally admit to a communal dread of networking events, so they were out in force to pick up tips from www.magickey.co.uk life coach Lyn Burgess at a Media Parents event kindly hosted by Prime Focus in Soho.
Lyn Burgess from The Magic Key Partnership is a consummate networker.
Lyn told us we would be analyzing our limiting beliefs and learning how to get rid of them, and we would learn how to make ourselves feel more confident before a networking event. Bring it on.
So why were Media Parents members keen to network? For support, to do research, broaden horizons, make money, to get out of the house, make contacts, promote ourselves, share ideas and recommend people.
Media Parents networkers Natalie Barb, Karen Ackerman, Lucy Sandys-Winsch, Lorraine Molloy and Michelle Martin listening to Lyn Burgess.
Lyn told us that it’s rare to actually get a job directly through networking but there’s a phrase called “paying it forward” in networking which is the belief that if you sort out opportunities for others then it will eventually come around for you. Hope so.
So why NOT network? It’s hard work, there’s a fear of rejection, shyness stops us, it’s relentless and sometimes boring. You can end up making a gaffe (Is here the place to admit that last time I was at the Edinburgh TV Festival I bounded up to Jimmy Carr after a great session and said “Well done, Alan.”?) We’re afraid of bothering people, feeling / seeming needy, we feel fake, don’t want to seem desperate – we’re too entrenched in our limiting beliefs to make the time to do it.
Hazel Palmer, Philippa Robinson and Prime Focus's Sara Hill get rid of some limiting beliefs.
Here’s how to get rid of a limiting belief. Get a pen and paper. Draw a table top (big enough to write on, and it’s going to have legs in a minute).
Write your limiting belief on the table top. (Ours were about networking, but it could be a limiting belief about anything). Here are some of the things people wrote: “I’m not good at selling myself to people I don’t know”. “I might not meet the right people”. ”I don’t feel I’m good enough”. “It’s hard work talking to strangers”. “I’m too old”. Heck.
Then you draw the 4 table legs, and down each leg you write a reason why you feel that way. So if your limiting belief is “I’m not good at selling myself to people I don’t know” you might write “I’m shy in groups”, “I think of all my career negatives”, “I engage my mouth before my brain” and “I’ve been staying at home too much”.
Next to each leg you write the counter argument – “Even a shy person can try to talk to anyone – what’s the worst that could happen?”, “Remember the praise I’ve had at work, and what I can do”, “I can research, plan ahead and have some things prepared to say”, “I will get out more”.
Scribble out the negatives, score through the limiting belief on the table top, screw up the paper and chuck it in the bin. You’ll have engaged different parts of your brain to do this exercise – creative, analytical, emotional, physical (who doesn’t find screwing up paper just a little bit satisfying?) – and that process helps you to move on and leave your limiting belief behind. ”Get it out of your head, onto a page, and then let it go.”
Now close your eyes.
Next Lyn taught us an NLP exercise. How do we want to feel before a networking event? Confident! (Unanimous). Close your eyes, take a couple of deep breaths and imagine a time when you felt confident. Visualize your state of mind, your surroundings etc and try to feel that you are there, feeling that feeling. Now, with your eyes still closed, make a gesture with your hand. Whenever you make this gesture, you will bring back your feelings of confidence.
"This gesture is your 'anchor' - you can't wear it out but you need to use it to feel the benefit", Lyn Burgess.
“This gesture is your ‘anchor’ – you can’t wear it out, but you need to use it to feel the benefit” Lyn told us.
Have a go, why not?
Stuck for something to say? Here’s an acronym to help: FORM
Family
Occupation
Recreation
Motivation
If you’re flying solo trying to break into a group then look around the room for signals – eye contact, smiling, a friendly face will do. You can always ask “Can I join you?” It’s rare that anyone will say no.
Questions from the floor: “How much chat should be about yourself?” “Less than you think”. Ask questions too. ”What should you do if you’re out of work?” “Don’t worry about it. Never apologise for what you haven’t done”. Prepare – research, it will help you feel more confident. If you want a job at a particular company find out what they’re doing at the moment, watch their stuff. “Identify what you are or what you want and confidence will follow”. ”How do you approach career gaps?” “With confidence. If you say ‘I’ve had kids’ in a confident way, people accept it”.
And with that they hit the booze and started networking.
David Vallance and Eoin O'Shea knock it back.
A good time was had by all. As Guy Lambert put it "It ruled. Good times".
Lyn Burgess is a life coach running The Magic Key Partnership www.magickey.co.uk . As a specialist in the film and television industry, Lyn has experience of working with hundreds of producers, directors, writers and actors since the company was established in 2002.
Much of Lyn’s work with clients revolves around career – keeping things in perspective, improving motivation for freelancers, transition from one role to another, building up confidence and networking for career development.
The Magic Key Partnership runs workshops on a monthly basis and one to one coaching for clients via email, telephone or Skype.
Lyn has kindly offered a discount on one-to-one coaching sessions or workshops to members of Media Parents.
www.mediaparents.co.uk - the jobs and social networking site for short term, part time, job share and regular hours jobs in media
Eoin O'Shea's limiting belief was soon toast.
"Get it out of your head, onto a page, then let it go".
Kate Middleton knew that very soon her surname would be her own again, and then there would be no stopping her.
I’m delighted to announce our next event – Tiger Aspect meets Media Parents.
www.mediaparents.co.uk is a new jobs and social networking website for people who want to work flexibly in media.
This is an exclusive opportunity for Media Parents to meet Creative Heads, Executive Producers and Production Managers from Tiger Aspect. The Company is renowned for the breadth and depth of its portfolio. Tiger Aspect produces Drama, Comedy, Entertainment, Factual, Children’s and Animation.
Interested?
Tiger Aspect HR Director Helen Matthews was so impressed by the talent she met at the Media Parents CV Event (see blog.mediaparents.co.uk) that she persuaded Tiger Aspect’s managers to take part, and was supported wholeheartedly by Tiger Aspect’s founder Peter Bennett-Jones.
Helen Matthews is HR Director at Tiger Aspect
There are 50 places available for Media Parents talent to meet Tiger Aspect both in an informal networking session and a timed appointment set-up on the evening. If you would like to attend this event you’ll need to submit your CV and covering letter for selection and admission will be by ticket only through http://mediaparentsmeetstiger.eventbrite.com
This event is for subscribers to www.mediaparents.co.uk and to encourage new people to join our network, and there will be a small admin charge. Tiger Aspect are inviting experienced talent from across the board to come and meet them – PMs, PDs, picture editors, directors, SPs, execs, EPs, APs, researchers, shooters, co-ordinators, writers so please purchase a ticket and send a CV marked with your full name, job title and ticket number to events@mediaparents.co.uk
If you have any questions please email events@mediaparents.co.uk but hopefully this covers it.
Media Parents thanks Tiger Aspect and Soho House for their support for this event – www.mediaparents.co.uk – yeah!
www.mediaparents.co.uk is a new jobs and social networking website for people who want to work flexibly in media. If you would like to share your experience on our blog please email admin@mediaparents.co.uk or contact us through the Media Parents site
Media Parents went on a networking jaunt to the Nations and Regions Conference at Salford last week with mixed results : stalked Alex Connock, bungled it with Steve Hewlett, hit it off with Skillset Scotland and convinced a cracking lady MD to write for the blog. The conference itself was very interesting, and great to meet people, but I am glad that Media Parents is hosting this : https://blog.mediaparents.co.uk/2011/01/new-year-new-you-jan-5th-event-how-to-network/ Albeit a little late for me.
Media City, Salford - hasn't she grown?
Steve Hewlett chaired (more on him later) introducing a great opening Q&A session with Kirsty Wark interviewing Left Bank Pictures supremo Andy Harries. Andy Harries is the guy Paul Greengrass called “a bright colour in a sea of grey execs”. I’m not going to transcribe the conversation, just pick some of the useful or interesting bits. (Hopefully).
On leaving Granada to set up his Left Bank Pictures Harries said “Once The Queen rattled through to The Oscars, I just thought ‘Well, I’ve got to do it’”. On running his own company: “I’ve never worked so hard in my life”. Quite.
Rumours that Andy Harries has turned to the bottle are just a silly gag.
When Andy Harries rallied and told Kirsty Wark he’d always been a big multi-tasker she quipped “Are you a woman?” then went on to observe that Left Bank’s showreel, which was of considerable length, solely featured male actors. Having warmed up, Wark then went on to take Harries to task for working largely with male writers and directors. He admitted that he could do better, but shortly afterwards we watched a clip of The Royle Family, directed and jointly written by Caroline Aherne. (Sue Johnston and Liz Smith reduced me to tears in about 2 minutes, which I fear is not proper behaviour at a conference. I managed silent sobbing but the person next to me probably got wet.)
Kirsty Wark asks Andy Harries "Are you a woman?"
On his intense relationships with writers Harries remarked “If you haven’t got the writer, you haven’t got anything” and on The Royle Family scripts “I thought ‘Jesus Christ this is Alan Bennett in Manchester form’”. The Royle Family was commissioned apparently as a blind pilot – that’s amazing isn’t it? Who takes those risks now?
They went on to talk about The Deal, and how David Morrissey had, for the two weeks between his first casting audition and his callback for Stephen Frears, gone and lived in Gordon Brown’s constituency in Scotland so he could nail the accent. I like that. We also heard that ITV dropped The Deal just before it went into production because they were in negotiation with the government over their own deal. Lucky Channel4. But then fortune often favours the brave.
Final word from Andy Harries on having his pitches rejected by the BBC (3 in a day, apparently) “If you get stuck on looking for a director, or looking for the money, start with the actor”. The Queen, apparently was inspired by the feeling that Helen Mirren was somewhat regal – it was only after she expressed interest that the writing began. If you haven’t got the writer and the talent, perhaps, you haven’t got anything. ”It doesn’t get any easier” Harries said, “you have to have a level playing field for everybody”.
Next : David Abraham, C4 Chief Exec’s keynote speech. To hear podcasts from the Nations and Regions Conference go here http://www.nationsandregionsmedia.org/
www.mediaparents.co.uk is a new jobs and social networking website for people who want to work flexibly in media. If you would like to share your experience on our blog please email admin@mediaparents.co.uk or contact us through the Media Parents site
www.mediaparents.co.uk is a new jobs and social networking website for people who want to work flexibly in media
Following the success of the Life Coaching session with Angus Fletcher, More Than Resolutions for 2011, Media Parents is delighted to be working with Lyn Burgess from The Magic Key Partnership who will be coaching on How to Network.
At this session for Media Parents members from 7 – 9pm on Tuesday 25th January in Soho, Lyn Burgess will be exploring limiting beliefs (and how to get rid of them), looking at feeling positive (and how to get there quickly) and discussing what to say. There will be an experiential element to the session plus a Q&A – perfectly timed just before our next event where Media Parents members will have the opportunity to network with execs across the board at one of the UK’s largest indies (more details soon). To reserve a place at Lyn Burgess’s lifecoaching session please email admin@mediaparents.co.uk
Life coach Lyn Burgess from www.magickey.co.uk
Lyn Burgess is a life coach running The Magic Key Partnership www.magickey.co.uk . As a specialist in the film and television industry, Lyn has experience of working with hundreds of producers, directors, writers and actors since the company was established in 2002.
Having previously worked in various operational roles, including Human Resources Director, for a number of years within the financial services industry, her philosophy on management has always taken a coaching bias.
The client base for The Magic Key Partnership includes emerging talent as well as Bafta winners and her clients include those making films with micro to multi million pound budgets, and those working within continuing drama on television.
Much of Lyn’s work with clients revolves around career – keeping things in perspective, improving motivation for freelancers, transition from one role to another, building up confidence and networking for career development.
The Magic Key Partnership runs workshops on a monthly basis and one to one coaching for clients via email, telephone or Skype.
Lyn has offered a discount on one-to-one coaching sessions or workshops to members of Media Parents.
Lyn Burgess 0845 129 7401
07801 366418
If you would like to read more about networking, click here:
https://blog.mediaparents.co.uk/2010/12/how-to-network-effectively/
To reserve a place at the How to Network coaching session please email admin@mediaparents.co.uk
www.mediaparents.co.uk worked with Life Coach Angus Fletcher www.angusfletcher.com and www.streetcoaching.com, to work out what people wanted from 2011 and how to achieve it.
Angus Fletcher addresses a full house of 26 people from Media Parents at his life coaching session
This blog will be a mixture of Angus’s wisdom as seen through the eyes of different people at the event. First, me. In a room full of do-ers, Angus asked us to step back from “doing”, and start connecting with our “feelings”.
Alex Evans introduces herself to Kylie McCarroll, and Jo Molloy, centre
As an icebreaker he asked us each to approach 3 different people in the room that we didn’t already know, and ask “how are you feeling about 2011?”
And with that the evening launched. There was a mixture of answers “optimism”, “anxiety”, “apprehension”, “excitement”, “determination”, but not many more than that – most of us were in the same headspace.
Angus asked “Think about what you want to achieve and how you want to be when you are doing those things – decide on your emotional response.”
We then were asked to do a visualization exercise. ”If you’re feeling that this is all a bit touchy feely for you, and you’re thinking ‘Oh no’, please channel your creativity and think ‘Oh yes’,” Angus asked. ”Close your eyes and imagine it’s been the year you wanted. See yourself in a place at the beginning of 2012 and see how you feel there.”
"If you're thinking 'Oh no', please channel your creativity and think 'Oh yes!'"
People felt peaceful, emotional, calm. Someone said “I imagined my house, painted.” Angus explained “This is the big A Agenda”, the endgame, “versus the small a agenda – the steps to get to the result. Create a measurable feeling of how you want to become and the visualization will pull you forward”. Perhaps you had to be there. But the idea of breaking down your plan into small tasks makes sense. ”Having imagined the bigger feeling, think of shorter term practical tasks”.
"Think about what you want to achieve and how you want to be when you are doing those things"
PECSAW is an acronym used to achieve “well-formed outcomes”. Get there, I suppose. It stands for :
Positive
Evidence
Context
Self Achievable
Advantages / Disadvantages
Worthwhile
so – frame your goal in POSITIVE language (less stressed, for example should be “calmer”). What would be the EVIDENCE of that? Sleeping better could be one outcome. CONTEXT is the part of your life you want to achieve this outcome – at home / at work, you choose. SELF ACHIEVABLE? Can I do it myself or do I need to influence things that are external. ADVANTAGES/ DISADVANTAGES are obvious, and whether it’s WORTHWHILE should determine whether you bother to try doing it, I guess.
"Is it self-achievable?" Course it is.
In the discussion that followed this, someone bravely admitted “I spend my life trying to find disadvantages – that’s why I’m here. These are the things I need to change”. Angus coached us on “filtering” to focus on the positives as well as the negatives.
Someone else told me “I’m not feeling as positive as when I came in, but I think that’s because I’m feeling more realistic about what I want to achieve (and that it might be possible). Just being here is a positive for me, creating the time to think about things”.
We moved on – here’s someone else’s view of the evening, lifted from the Media Parents watercooler:
“Angus’s life coaching session was a good introduction – and left
me wanting more. For those unable to make it we touched briefly on where we wanted to be in a year’s time (focusing on emotional association rather than career or practical ones). Angus, the life coach, then asked us to reflect on a struggle that we had overcome in 2010 – identifying those strengths we had inside that helped us achieve this. We had to predict what our hurdles would be in 2011 and showed us briefly that we had it in us to access those strengths that we had already possessed.”
"Is the hurdle internal or external? If you're thinking it's a huge thing it's probably YOU".
Angus asked “Is the hurdle internal or external? If you are finding it hard to identify whether the hurdle is internal or external, it’s probably internal (you). If you’re thinking it’s a huge thing – it’s probably you”. That’s a hell of a home truth to contemplate. Debbie said “Last year I made a big decision to keep stress in different compartments when I was working and moving house at the same time – that’s work / this is life”. Someone else told me “It’s been good to vocalise what’s been going on internally. I’m definitely going to think more about advantages”.
Angus encouraged us to “recognise that you may face hurdles and be prepared for them. If you want the confidence to become ‘intentional’ then don’t take these things by chance – think about how you feel when you feel confident and learn to turn on those behaviours so that your feeling of confidence isn’t by chance but you can summon it.”
Here’s a list of SUCCESSFUL BEHAVIOURS:
"I feel more positive and more focused"
being intentional
expanding your range and flexibility
being curious
zooming in / zooming out (to look at detail or the bigger picture)
noticing your impact
building rapport
focusing on the result
Thanks to life coach Angus Fletcher for an inspiring evening at ENVY
Overwhelmingly the people from Media Parents who took part in the workshop felt that working with Angus had positively influenced their outlook for the year ahead. Here are a few comments made anonymously “I will be more definite about what I want”. “I’ve realised that my biggest hurdle is me and my attitude”. ”I’m going to take more risks this year”. “I had a good laugh and got a lot from the energy of the group”. “I feel more upbeat about tackling the year ahead”.
If you’d like to look at Angus Fletcher’s powerpoint presentation of the evening, please click here: MediaParentsPresentation To discuss life coaching with Angus and benefit from a discount he’s offering to Media Parents members, please go to www.angusfletcher.com or click the logo.
